well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
