I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
