Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize