No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
