I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
