im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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