WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize