I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
