Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
