Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
