he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
operation harelip BJ is a go
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
