it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Floor bacon is actually really good
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize