so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
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The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
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I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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