Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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