It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
