I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
