Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
love makes seman taste better
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Green mimosas i think yes
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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