It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
