he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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