Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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