Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
