just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
