shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The feeling are messing with the penis
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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