You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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