your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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