sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My breasts were aching with rage.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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