people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize