i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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