I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize