did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
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