I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
