do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
