I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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