i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I could have mohawked her pubes.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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