it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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