I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Randomize