Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
