I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
