Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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