belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
