Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
