Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
my shit smells like andre
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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