Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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