So drunk, too bad you don't want this
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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