I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
pop tarts are not kleenex
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
We are two peas in an std pod
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
