Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize