Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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