I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
we're making bets on your personal life
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
