oh god the rape fog is back!
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
