im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
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It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Randomize
