I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
